UoM
by MissfitThunder
Summary: It's the Union of Mud Men! Mud men have discovered the People and this is about what happens because of it. Rated T to be safe.
1. The Wrestling Match

**This is a fic that I started on Fangathering and thought people might want to see it. This was my first fic!**

**Disclaimer: All rights belong to Eoin Colfer except the two OCs. **

* * *

Artemis was being tortured. Not literally but to him it was torture. Butler and Holly were making him wear jeans and a t-shirt to Juliet's wrestling match.

"Butler, we really must choose are things more carefully. I mean, who wears jeans?" Aremis asked, trying to sound as if he didn't care too much.

"Nice try, Arty," Holly said teasingly.

I'll never get used to her calling me that, Artemis thought

"Juliet is up. We can go after this," Butler informed him.

"Ladies and gentlemen! Here is the moment we have all been waiting for! Who will win? The Jade Princess or Crazy Bear?" a person annonced.

Artemis was scouting the room, looking for any crazy business men, metal man, or child genii. His gaze caught the one of a young girl, possibly 11 who had raven colored wavy hair, proclain skin, and emerald colored eyes, and the boy she was sitting with, who also appeared to be 11.

An emotion he was unfamiliar with blasted through him. Blasted pruperty. The girl turned in Artemis' direction. She whispered something to the boy and got up. She strolled to area where Artemis was. It took a couple seconds for him to realize she was right in front of him.

"Why were you staring at me?!" the girl demanded.

"I, I…" Artemis trailed off.

The girl looked at him, like looked at him, for the first time. She stared at him, her mouth opening and closing, like she was trying to say something but couldn't think of the right words. Finally, she mouthed something. Artemis Fowl.

Even if Artemis wasn't a self-trained lip reader, it was quite obvious what she mouthed. The girl now glanced at Butler and where Holly was. Artemis felt his pulse quicken. If another person was to discover the People, they are doomed, he thought.

"Yes, I am Artemis Fowl."

"I know," she squinted at the heat haze that was Holly. She froze.

"How did a heat haze get here unless… No. It can't be," she pondered. "Forgive me for my lack of manners. My name is Reyna. So they really do exist," she commented.

"Who exsit?" Artemis asked, fearing he knew exactly what she was talking about.

"The People! I thought the government was going crazy!"

"What meant you mean?" Holly asked as she stopped shielding.

"I'll tell you when we get somewhere secure."

"As much as I hate to say it, the girl we just met is right. There are at least a dozen people I have seen in other places recently," Artemis agreed.

"We have a situation here," Butler said.

Everyone turned to face him.


	2. Goblins

Haven City was a wreck. It all happened when goblins invaded. The goblins jumped out of no where and wrecked the main power grid again. It seemed that the goblins were getting smarter or the People were getting dumber.

What happened here, thought Zane.

Zane was an elf. He had chestnut colored skin and raven colored hair. His hazel eyes sparkled in artificial sunlight. Quite average for an elf but most thought differently. Zane strolled up to Police Plaza.

"Sup Zane."

"What's up, Zane?"

"Hey, Zane!"

Zane was bombarded with with other LEP members as he walked to his office. Maybe he could get here before…

"Zane!" the paranoid centaur he hoped to avoid barked. "What are you doing?" Foaly asked, like Zane was smuggling Swear Toads to Wing Commander Vinyàya.

"Walking?" he replied though it sounded more like a question.

"Well I got a mission for you."

"Let me guess. Since Holly is already doing something, you are being forced to resort to me."

"Not quite. Commander Kelp requested you specifically."

"And this is going to be a quiet stroll that involves walking down the street and tranquilizing a paranoid centaur?" Zane asked, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

"I would had yu booted out off here long ago if I wasn't a big fan of mockery myself," Foaly said. "Enough of the chitchat! There are several loose goblins in Haven and they are causing total chaos. Here is te newest model that we got, the Nuterino 7000. It is the best we have ever had and is completely fire-proof so no problems there," he continued, not-so modestly.

"Yessir."

"Good luck Zane," Foaly said.

Maybe he is not so bad, Zane thought.

"If you don't, Commander Kelp will have your hide."

Who was I kidding, Zane thought.

So now Zane was dashing through the streets of Haven, trying to locate the goblins since Foaly had 'forgotten' to give him a locator.

It was not a hard task. The goblins left complete destruction in their wake. The stereos were on fire, the lights of the city were out, and it appeared that the goblins actually fought the innocent people of the city.

Odd, he thought. Goblins are normally stupid.

"Hey ugly!" Zane screamed at a goblin when he caught up. "Did you do all of this or did your mommy threatened to tear out your disgusting guts out of your even words mouth?"

Man, I must really have a death wish, Zane thought.

The goblin in question was Boon. He turned around and conjured a fireball. Boon flung it at Zane.

"Missed me, missed me, now you gotta run for your life!" Zane teased.

"I wasn't trying to hit you," Boon growled.

Zane looked down instinctively. There was a cord.

"D'arvit!" Zane screamed as he ran as fast as he could away from the cord. Then Zane followed the cord with his eyes. "D'arvit," he whispered. The cord went underground and came up at the other side of the city. Zane tried to contact Foaly and warn him and that's when Haven blew up.

It wasn't that big of an explosion. Police Plaza was completely demolished and so was all the other areas LEP took care of.

Foaly trotted out of the building. "Zane! What have you done?" Foaly asked.

"Nothing. Its not like goblins just blew up Police Plaza," Zane answered.

"We have no time for that!" Foaly screamed.

"What is it then?" asked Zane, clearly aggravated.

Suddenly, a giant helicopter broke through the ceiling.

"Confirmed. It is here," a deep voice said.

"Now we kill the girl that warned us about this," another voice said.

"What the heck? She saved the human race from extinction. She should be rewarded beyond measure."

"Shut up! Don't you want the money?" the deep voice screamed.

"Fine. Now anyone down here put up your hands and come forward slowly," Rhein other voice commanded as he waved a Sig Saucer in the air, settling on Zane.

"What do you want from us?" Zane demanded.

"Close your mouth before I make you," ordered the voice.

Zane opened his mouth to reply but ten thought better of it.

"Good," the voice said as he stepped into view. It was a man, taller than Butler, more athletic than Juliet, and had a crazed look on his face.

"Drop them," he commanded.

"As you wish sir," the other man said as he opened the bottom of the copter. A dozen atomic bombs dropped out of the copter.

Zane let instincts take over as he fled as fast as possible. Then he remembered Foaly.

"Look who's saving his hairy hide again," Zane muttered as he went back. The bombs exploded.

Suddenly, Zane and Foaly were surrounded by other LEP officers.

"Hi, we're back!" Zane said a upbeat as he could muster.


	3. Bye Bye, Old Friends

"You tell us this now?" Holly shouted."Couldn't you tell us when we were figuring out who the girl is?"

"The damage is done," Reyna said. "Now, what exactly are we facing?"

"You mean the giant people that are starting to surround us?" Juliet asked, abandoning her match.

"Yes," Butler replied. Why does crazy things always happen when we are at a wrestling match, Butler thought.

Everyone glance around them.

"There is at least 3 people coming from this side," Artemis reported.

"Same," commented Reyna.

"Yup," Juliet agreed.

"I don't see anyone on this side," wondered Holly.

"That's because we are already here," a deep voice growled.

Everyone jumped.

"Butler?" Artemis asked. No reply came. "Just great," he muttered.

"So now you look for your bodyguard. Unfortunately for some of you, we don't need all of you," the man said.

Juliet and Holly adopted fighting stances. The men looked amused. Artemis and Reyna looked around.

"Great, we will barely survive 1, much less 9," Reyna muttered.

The men strolled in causally until there was no room between Reyna, Artemis, Holly, and Juliet.

"Take this!" Juliet shouted, aiming for the biggest one, hitting Artemis in the process.

"Stop fighting, we are going to end up beating each other, not them!" Artemis realized.

Naturally, Holly ignored Artemis and tried punching the man closest to her and hit Reyna.

"Stop!" Reyna screamed. "Don't you see he is right?" No one listened to her.

The men chuckled, amused.

"Juliet, instead of punching or kicking, why don't you use your special move?" Artemis suggested.

No reply came. "Guess what? We only need one more person! You know who the lucky person is?" the man asked.

"Juliet?" Reyna asked, searching for her.

"That's right!" The man said as he hit a button. A truck drove in and the man opened the doors. Butler and Juliet were bound to chairs with explosives on them. They were trying to mouth run.

Reyna and Holly turned around to sprint. Artemis stood there. The men took out giant guns. They shot Artemis.

"Chill ax, Holly. They have been modified to shoot only darts," Reyna said.

Holly charged, weaved through random people, and jumped to get to the Butlers. The men constituently fired, and somehow none of them hit their target.

This is another trap, Reyna realized. "Holly!" She shouted but her voice was lost int e chaos.

Holly got to the car and was about to untie Butler. The men chuckled. She reached for her knife, trying to cut Butler loose. As soon as she hit the rope, something exploded in her face. One of the men shot her, leaving Reyna staring in horror. Reyna walked to Artemis to see if he had a phone. The man strolled to her. He punched her in the gut, leaving her gasping for breath. Then he brought out a knife.

"Congratulations, not many get to go this way," the man said.

Reyna spun around, refusing for this to be the end. Reyna hit his hand so his knife would go flying.

"Not happening, sweetie," the man said. He brought out the dart gun and fired. The dart hit its target. Reyna stumbled backwards as she became unconscious.

A young lady was watching from a distance. Everything was going according to the plan.


	4. The Thing

"Zane, what happened?"

"Are you ok, Zane?"

"Zane! Thank goodness you're alright!"

"Please guys! I don't want to deal with this right now," Zane said, trying to get out of everyone's way. Of course, nobody listened.

Zane started backing up slowly.

"ZANE!" barked Trouble. "What in the name of Frond happened?"

"Can I tell you later? It's a long story,"

"Long story short," Trouble replied, narrowing his eyes.

"Fine. Goblins lighting Haven on fire, Mud-Men discovering us, and bomb exploding. Happy?" Zane replied, clearly not in a good mood.

"Yes, Captain," the commandeered replied. "I'll have your report tomorrow,"

Zane turned around and ran, sick of all the nonsense. He ran to E37. It was completely empty except for the person who ran it. Zawhew want on the shuttle to the surface.

I'm NEVER going back there, Zane thought bitterly. Ever.

* * *

When Zane reached the surface, he sat down on the floor. He suddenly realized how exhausted he was. It would be to weird to lay down in the middle of nowhere, he thought. Maybe I'll meditate.

Randomly, a purplish-bluish mix of swirly stuff appeared in front of him.

Do I have the Atlantis Complex? This cannot be real, Zane thought.

The swirly stuff stopped moving. There was a door in its place. The door opened. A gold ring dropped out with a demented thing screaming ' My precious, my Precious!' constantly.

I think I recognize this thing.

Then the door turned into a fire color. It again turned into a door. A clay dragon stepped out.

Ok, I definitely have the Complex, Zane decided.

Complex? What is this Complex you speak of? a voice said in Zane's head that was definitely not his own.

Zane suddenly realized why he recognized the thing.

"D'arvit," Zane cursed.

* * *

**Sorry about how short this chapter is. When I wrote this, I couldn't make it longer. Curse writer's block. **


	5. Simon and Gollum

"ARTEMIS! HOLLY! WAKE UP!" Reyna screamed while people walking by were giving her weird looks.

Slowly, Artemis began to stir. He stood up, and muttered,"Butler?"

"Butler and Juliet have been kidnapped! We have to save them!" Reyna screamed.

Holly awoke. "Not so fast. For all we know, you planed the attack so you don't have to tell us what you know."

"Can we just get going?" Reyna complained.

"It's 'may' not 'can' since everyone can," Artemis corrected.

"Whatever. Come on all ready."

"Ok, ok," Holly muttered, starting up their car.

"Can you drive any faster than 200 miles an hour?" Reyna complained. Holly went slower.

Then, Holly saw a small child. Or one of the People, she thought.

Zane was trying to figure out what he would do about the Complex when he saw a car moving very slowly heading his way. He jumped up, waving his arms, trying to get them to stop. They kept going. Zane jumped in front of their car.

The car screeched to a halt. "What do you think you're doing?" a red headed elf with chestnut skin and a hazel and blue eyes asked.

Oh, its Holly, the superstar of the LEP, Zane thought.

"Holly, that's your name, right?" he asked.

"I don't remember you," Holly replied.

"You're Holly, the famous one of the LEP."

"Of course, everyone knows me. And I asked what are you doing because elfs don't belong above ground."

"Don't shoot me. Whatever you do, don't shoot me," Zane replied.

Holly shot him.

"Holly, WHAT DID YOU SHOOT THE KID FOR?" Reyna asked, startled.

"There could have been a good reason he said not to shoot him," agreed Artemis.

"He could have been dangerous," Holly replied neutraly.

"Stop the car, we are bringing him to Haven," Reyna ordered.

"No," Holly replied.

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes," Reyna said again, clearly losing her patience.

"No."

"Good bye," Reyna said solemnly, jumping out the window.

"What the hell?" Artemis asked.

"Let's get going," Holly said.

"We need her, how are we going to learn about this union she spoke of,"

"You hack whoever she hacked," Holly said simply.

"It's way too probable that she destroyed the information,"

"Fine. But it'll take the night. We have gone far."

Reyna staggered forward, startled that she actually did that. Jump out a window? Her? The very idea was absurd. She chuckled. She started the slow walk to the elf.

When she got there, the thing was examining the elf.

Hey wait a second, is that Gollum from Lord of the Rings? Reyna thought.

She sprinted to the elf. Gollum, startled, jumped back. Reyna placed a hand on the elf. Please wake, she prayed.

His eyes started to flutter and he regained consciousness.

"Who are you?" Reyna asked, hoping that the elf wouldn't kill her.

"I am Simon. And who may you be?" Simon asked.

" Uh Reyna," Reyna replied.

"Good, now lets go back in time. I need a *blurts random science stuff Artemis would not know about* and a *another science thing*,"

"What?" Reyna asked, confused. "Are you an-"

"Hold your thought. One of your thoughts is worth a sparkling diamond."

I wish I could electrocute him, Reyna happened to be thinking.

"Do you happen to have an electrocuter?"

Simon was now flopping like a fish out of water on the floor, moaning.

"Hello?" Reyna asked.

"Hey. Where would you find the thing you are looking for?"

"Excuse me? I'm not looking for anything."

"DOH!"

"Thats it, you are a worthless idiot," Reyna decided, reaching for his belt. She snatched his Neutrino and put it to his throat.

"Now tell me, I know no one is this dumb so are you an alter?"

"A what?" Simon asked.

"An alter ego. A different personality. It often happens when someone has the Atlantis Complex," stated Reyna as though she was reading a textbook.

"I guess."

"Ok," Reyna said, shooting him.

Simon fell unconscious.

"Now that's all settled, I need a car," muttered Reyna.

Gollum appeared again.

"My precious! You dare wear my precious!" Gollum screamed.

Reyna glanced at her neck. She saw a glittering golden ring, her replica that she bought when she fell in love with the series.

"It's a fake."

"NO!" Gollum screamed.

Reyna hoisted the Neutrino up again. I hope this can take it, she thought. She aimed and fired. It hit Gollum directly on the chest.

Why isn't there anyone I know when I need them? Reyna thought.


	6. Because of the Ring

"Holly, we just passed them," Artemis noticed.

"No, they are coming up."

"Stop the car before I pull a Reyna," commanded Artemis.

"Pull a Reyna? Since when did you say things like that?" Holly asked.

"Then stop the car before I jump out the window. I've been spending to much time around you and Juliet," Artemis muttered.

The car suddenly stopped.

"To much time around us?" Holly asked incredulously.

"I'm sorry Holly. This is madness," he said as he took off running.

"Stupid mud-boy," Holly muttered. "Even though he is a juvenile genius."

Artemis was walking, no sprinting. The great Artemis Fowl II was sprinting for the first time. Reyna, the elf, and the thing were in sight.

Suddenly, he fell on his face.

* * *

He woke up with a girl with red hair, an eye like his, and a hazel eye.

"You've been unconscious for an hour, Arty," Holly said.

"We have to get moving. The thing is trying to attack Reyna!" he shouted.

"No more running for you, we're flying," Holly said, grabbing Artemis and activating her wings.

When they got there, the thing screamed. "My precious! You dare wear my precious!"

"You call that a thing?" Holly asked Artemis. "It's Gollum."

"Gollum?"

"You've never seen the Hobbit or Lord of the Rings? Or read the books?" Holly asked.

Artemis shook his head. "Reyna is in trouble."

Reyna glanced down. "It's a fake."

Holly glanced at Artemis. "That's not going to help her."

"NO!" Gollum screamed.

Reyna hoisted the Neutrino up an fired. It hit him squarely in the chest. Reyna let down her guard for a second. Of course, it was in the second that Gollum got up.

"REYNA!" Artemis screamed as Gollum jumped on her back.

* * *

Huh, she wondered. Someone called my name.

Suddenly, there was something heavy on her back.

"Get off me you little-"

Gollum clawed in her back. "Give it to me, GIVE IT!"

"Ow, ow, OW!" Reyna shouted. I can't take this much longer, she thought.

Then, the elf that she jumped out a window to save woke up.

"'Bout time, sleepy head," she said while Gollum bit her finger.

"NO!" Artemis screamed. This couldn't be happening. Since Holly refuesed to stop, Reyna would probably die.

Artemis charged forward with a new found strength. "Reyna, I'm coming!"

Reyna couldn't see. Or hear. Or smell. Not even taste. What's happening? Reyna wondered, freaking out. In the Return of the King, this didn't happen to Frodo.

Reyna moved her arm, the one tht didn't have Gollum biting it. She brought it to her hand, the hand with Gollum on it.

She lept back in pain.

There was two sets of hands on her, not Gollum's, human and elf.

* * *

Artemis went up to Zane.

"We have to do something, she saved me from Simon," Zane said.

"Yes, but not for the reason you think," Artemis agreed. Together, they put their hands on her.

"Now, I need to take her to the LEP," Zane instructed.

"You mean with Holly?"

"No, I work there," the elf said, and Artemis found himself wondering why he never asumes the obvious.


	7. A New Friend?

Holly, Artemis, and Zane made it into Haven but something was clearly wrong. No one was on the streets, no lights were on in the houses, the artificial sunlight was out even though it was noon.

"I should have never left," Zane muttered while Holly said,"Why did I go to that wrestling match?"

"It's neither of your faults," Artemis stated, looking at them in the eye.

They continued their walk to Argon's clinic. When they got there, there was no one in there.

The group walked through the clinic, searching for signs of life. A door flew open and out walked a big mud man. He was more than a man mountain, more like a madness solar system! Holly's eyes grew the size saucers. Reyna rolled of Zane and Artemis's arms. She landed at their feet.

"Fellow humans, join us. We will destroy these things," he indicated at Holly,"once and for all."

Reyna was conscious. She walked up tot the mud man.

"Why don't you-" Reyna punched him when she said 'you'," stay out of your own business?" Reyna kicked him in the shin.

He jumped back, causing another solar system man to appear.

"It's so on now," he snarled, moving forward to hit Holly. Holly was able to dodge, courtesy of LEP training.

Reyna took a fighting stance. She was about to hammer him when a green foggy mist appeared. It was caught on fire when an elf with long blond hair, green clothes, and was holding a bow stepped out.

"Where am I?" he asked. Then he jumped. "The Ring!" he shouted. Holly sighed. More Lord of the Rings characters.

Reyna was staring at him, her mouth open. She didn't even bother to correct him. Then the mud men grabbed Holly, and put her in a bag. The bag moved obit then a man put a tazer in there and the bag fell limp.

Reyna continued to stare at him. "You're, you're…" she stammered.

"I am Legolas Thranduil, prince of Mirkwood," he said and Reyana nearly fainted.

Legolas grabbed his bow and shot one of the men.

"He isn't dead, is he?" Artemis asked, tentivly. Legolas shook his head.

Then, a noise like a stamped happened. Everyone went back to back. Artemis moved and slapped Reyna.

"We really need a new staregy," Reyna said. Legolas nodded in adhere ment and Reyna blushed.

"Reyna, Legolas, Zane, they vanished," Artemis said. Everyone spun around.

"WHAT?!"

Artemis nodded. "They vanished." With that he wandered off. Reyna ran after him.

"Wait, Artemis!" she shouted, but he ignored her. "Don't you want to hear what I know," Reyna tried bribing him. He turned around.

"Tell me what you know," he commanded as everyone sat down, waiting for the information.


	8. Mort Mart

**Merry Christmas! Sorry for the typos if any, I updated on my iPod. Also, there hasn't been an update in a while because I was working on a fanfic for StarlightGiligalad (sorry if misspelled) because she commented. **

* * *

Reyna nodded. "It was a typical afternoon. Just me, my brothers, and my friend Aliana. We were getting ready to go swimming when a ship fell from the sky and landed in my backyard.

"It was weird. Besides the fact it was made of solid gold, it had no windows, yet someone knew we were there. A man named Tobais, my neighbor, stepped out.

"I relaxed. My big mistake. He strolled toward me and Aliana. He grabbed Aliana by her chin and shoved her against the ship's wall. Blood spilled. And there was no red sun. Te next day." Reyna paused and looked at Legolas.

She continued: "Me and my brothers headed for our house, but the moment we got in, a man like the one we just saw appeared. He grabbed my brothers and sniffed them. Then he took one and snapped his neck and took the other one and put him in the ship.

"I snuck on the ship to rescue my brother but was stopped. Not by a person, but by something. . . gone. Then a picture of my friend Aliana appeared. It wasn't a picture though, more like a actual being. She had a gun in her hand. "Come, Reyna. We need to beat them," she said but I stopped. The gun wasn't pointed at the exit, but at me. Plus, Aliana was too gentle to even think something like she said.

"She fired. I barely ducked, still prosessing what happened. In my mind, my friend tried to kill me. I darted for the exit, only to find another shield in the way.

"It blew up half the ship. I was bleeding so bad, most of my leg was covered in blood, but only one area was really bad. I staggered to the nearest room, which was a computer lab.

"Most of the lab was ruined. Only one computer still worked. That computer had a flash drive on it. I grabbed it and the computer. I tired running but one of those men stopped me. I looked for an exit, but before I could locate one, I saw my brother's dead body. I thought my heart stopped. Plus, my parents were inside and haven't came out to the explosions. I tripped on some debris and the computer dropped, but a disk was ejected. I grabbed it and ran.

"On the disk was a video. The video had people with blank eyes, knot noticing anything. The people were blindly following the solar system dudes. The men gave all the shells, I guess, guns. They brought them to an airport. They stole a plane and went to the Atlantic and suddenly dove under. This blue light appeared. It killed all the things by it. Then there was this bar of chocolate. It was being constructed by thousands. Then a voice said, "I'll see right to it," and it ended.

"On the flash drive, it had exactly who was a member and where they were located. Also, it had so much information about the People. Like what that blue light was and how to know if a fairy is there but shielding. And about the mesmer," Reyna finished. "That's how I knew someone was in the area."

Artemis stood. "Where's the base?"

"You're going to love this," Reyna started. "Orion found a cave that has a dragon in it. That dragon is guarding the layer. The layer is right next to Mort Mart **(A/N: I just made that up. It is Publix except I'm not using Publix since I don't know of there is any around there)**."

"Orion? What?" Artemis asked.

"Who's Orion?" questioned Zane.

"Artemis's alter ego," explained Reyna.

"When did he come back?" Artemis looked worried.

"Haven't you been looking at ? Last week."

Legolas started towards the door. He drew his bow. "That Mort Mart, does it happen to be by Mirkwood?"

Reyna and Zane looked at each other, then Artemis.

"Legolas? This isn't Middle Earth," Zane said slowly.

"Why is the Ring here?"

"I am a really big Lord of the Rings fan so I bought a rep-" Reyna strayed but Gollum came flying out of nowhere.

Legolas shot him and Gollum fell to the floor. Gollum and Legolas grew fainter and the ring grew more solid. Then Gollum grabbed the ring and pulled it to him.

"Reyna! You can get to Mort Mart by jumping into Mount-" Legolas was saying until he vanished.

Gollum tore the ring from Reyna's neck and Reyna snatched it back, leaving a cut in her hand and neck. Reyna jumped out of the window of the clinic.

Zane and Artemis followed.

"She sure likes windows," Artemis muttered.

They got to Police Plaza with Foaly waiting for them.

"What are you doing, Zane!" Foaly shouted. "A mud-girl and Fowl!"

Zane bowed his head. "This mud-girl helped us with information and Artemis was a witness."

Foaly stepped forward. "Zane, what is the girl's name?"

"Reyna." The black haired girl stepped forward. "Foaly, we need to use your machine gadget thingy."

Foaly cocked his head.

"She means your Worsfer," Artemis corrected.

"Worsfer was never completely tested. It may be dangerously transfers you between dimensions," Foaly warned, already aware that Artemis hacked his computer.

"We'll take our chances," Zane said.

Foaly beckoned them forwards. They reached his lab.

Foaly reached out and grabbed a small button.

Reyna grabbed it and pushed it. In a moment, Reyna and Artemis were in Mount Doom.

"Uhh, there!" Reyna shouted, pointing at a small crack.

She climbed down and touched her ring to the crack. The crack grew wider and it had a portal and a blue orb in it. Reyna grabbed the orb and shouted,

"ARTEMIS! COME HERE!" Artemis slowly climbed down.

Reyna grabbed Artemis's arm and jumped, pulling them both into the portal.

They were back, but Artemis was on a lamp post.

"Foaly! We're back!" Reyna shouted.

Artemis fell down. He looked around and sighed. "We aren't in Haven."

"WHAT?!" Reyna screamed. Then she turned around. Instead of Haven, there was destruction and bodies laying on the floor.

Artemis's gaze went past the destruction to the nearest place, which happened to be Mort Mart. There was one of the huge men guarding.

Artemis went off to the building. Reyna followed.

"Those kids, where are they?" one spoke into his watch. Watch, Reyna thought while Artemis thought, our civilization has grown more advanced than we have thought.

"They vanished when we got here," a small voice emitted from the watch.

"Okay, and the others?"

"Where we left them."

Then he voice shouted," Code Silver!"

The man standing guard whipped out a gun.

Well not too much, Artemis amended.

The man shot in the direction of Walmart (yeah, I'm not creating something for this. Hey, Tolkien created a whole language for the elves yet named a mountain Mt. Doom). The glass window exploded into smaller and smaller bit until they were microscopic.

Someone screamed. The alarm was going off. People were dying yet instead of vanishing like the glass, they stayed were they were and changed shape. Soon, they became elves.

"Battle commence!" A commander shouted. He walked through the aisles of dead elves until he found the one he was looking for.

"You little trouble maker," he muttered, searching through his LEP suit.

Artemis froze. Trouble, was that just a coincidence? Or was the commander really in trouble?

The human apparently found what he was looking for and stood up.

The human pulled out his watch. "Bubble supreme," he ordered as he hit a button. A bubble appeared. "Two spaces forward," the human ordered. The bubble grabbed the elf and put him inside. The elf was sat upright.

It was Trouble. His eyes were glassy, but his chest was moving up and down steadily.

Just wait till Holly hears about this, Reyna thought.

The bubble and the human commander walked into the building and the guard locked the door behind them.

Reyna casually strolled to Walmart. She stopped in front of it, gazing at the destruction. Artemis followed. Plenty more mimicked it.

Though Artemis appeared to be looking at Walmart, he were really looking for any other elves that he knew. His gaze landed on Lili Frond.

Lili was a bloody mess. But she was always the blonde bimbo that wouldn't break a nail to save her family. When did she become the knight? Lili appeared to be dead but she winked at Artemis. Artemis sighed in relief.

Of course Reyna wasn't really looking at the destruction either. She was looking at the other human's reactions. Most of them seemed fine with the elves being dead, happy even. Only one blonde girl with green eyes seemed disturbed in the slightest.

Reyna walked towards her. "Why aren't you happy that those freaks of nature are dead?"

"Freaks of nature? Those people saved my life," the blonde responded.

"They are evil," Reyna lied. "Who are you?"

The blonde's face grew red. "They are not evil and I assume that you only know the boy genius, the Fowl. Then again, I purposely don't let myself be known. You never know what can happen. My name is Minerva. Minerva Parazido."

"Yes!" Reyna whooped. Faves turned to her. "Oops," she muttered. "More people on the People's side!" She whisper-shouted.

"But you said they were-oh! Do you know anyone else?" Minerva asked.

Reyna nodded. "Follow me." Reyna led her to Artemis.

"Hello, Minerva," Artemis said, nodding.

"Hello, Artemis. Where is Holly?" Minerva asked.

"I believe she with the humans. I presume that you are with the People or you wouldn't be talking to me. You must know something."

"Yes," Minerva said, "the humans have codes. I know what Code Gold, Code Silver, Code Platinum, Code Black, and Code White mean."

"What are they?" Reyna asked.

The human guard turned and locked his eyes on them.

* * *

**Mauhahaha! Once again, Merry Christmas! Anyway, comment! It motivates me (Even though that made this update way longer than planned). I'm sorry if the format is weird, I don't know, I updated from my iPod like I said. Special thanks to StarlightGilgalad for commenting. I hope your Christmas was great! ~ThunderSpirit/MissfitThunder**


	9. Mort Mart Part 2

**Once again, thank you StarlightGilgalad for the awesome reviews. The fic dedicated to her is officially out! Happy New Year people! It's still the eve for me but if it isn't, happy New Year! **

Everyone froze but he strolled closer to them. He didn't whip out his gun like when someone said Code Silver, but he had his fists out.

The rest of them were being killed. Not just the Walmart shoppers, but Cold Stone, Walgreens, Target, and Pizza Hut shoppers.

Lets go! Minerva was clearly thinking.

"Um, look." Reyna pointed at the man that froze. He was literally two feet away.

Artemis turned and walked casually the way to Macy's.

"Artemis, that won't work," Minerva hissed. "People are panicking."

The man got to them and punched Reyna in the face. She didn't fall to the floor, but she certainly wasn't in any condition to fight. Reyna stumbled forward, her fists balled, preparing to punch, only to be smacked again, this time on her nose. She was pushed to the ground and her nose was bleeding really bad.

Meanwhile, Artemis and Minerva were dashing to Mort Mart. In Artemis's case, trying to not trip. Already he had tripped seven times, his nose almost like Reyna's because of this.

Finally Artemis reached Reyna, Minerva glaring at him.

"Artemis! You really need to get into physical condition," scolded Minerva while a miniature war was happening.

Artemis ignored her and reached down to help Reyna up. Reyna waved away the arm and stood. She darted into Mort Mart leaving Artemis and Minerva wondering how she ran like that if she was supposedly injured.

"Code Platinum, I repeat, Code Platinum," the man said.

"What was that one?" Artemis whispered.

"They know someone unauthorized entered Mort Mart," Minerva replied. "We might as well join Reyna since they know someone is in."

Artemis nodded and sprung forward. Minerva mimicked his action. Reyna was waiting for them.

They stood, gazing at the inside.

"I did not expect it to be like this," Reyna remarked. None of hem did. Who would expect a secret layer's entrance to be actually what the store claimed to be?

Shoppers were wandering, people buying, children whining. (Haha, that rhymes. Oops.)

"Great! Now let's her a band aid!" Reyna exclaimed, dashing to the nearest worker. Minerva quickly followed. Artemis was left staring in wonder, gazing at them, his face clearly saying how do they run all the time?

"Excuse me, ma'am, where are the band aids?" questioned Minerva.

"Aisle 12," she replied, "and don't you think you should, I don't know, have an adult handle this stuff, not a child like you?"

Minerva's eyes flared. "I am not an ignorant child wandering around staring at video games!"

The woman turned to face them. "I'm sorry, would you like to go to Pizza Hut and stop bothering the h*ll out of me?" (A/N: I don't like cursing. So deal with it. I wrote that word once before and that took a lot of effort. Not doing that again)

Artemis arrived. "Children's menu? I would not like to see the children's menu. Not now, not ever. I have no doubt the children's menu itself tastes better than the meals on it. Also, if you haven't noticed, mademoiselle, we aren't at Pizza Hut. We are in Mort Mart and asked a simple question."

The woman stood there stunned. "T-that way," she stammered.

Artemis chuckled quietly. It was like that day all those years ago where the waitress asked him the very same question before his meeting with Spiro.

Reyna speed walked to Aisle 12 and found the band aids. Minerva grabbed one and opened the box. Artemis put his hand in and took out one of the band aids and quickly applied one to Reyna's nose.

"Artemis, I thought you weren't a criminal," Reyna mentioned.

"Once a millionaire criminal mastermind, always a millionaire criminal mastermind."

"Whatever."

Minerva walked out of the aisle. She saw a worker talking to a janitor.

"Clean up Aisle 13," he ordered.

"But sir, there is no Aisle 13," he protested.

Minerva could have sworn dramatic music was playing.

She turned to Reyna. Reyna had her iPhone out and was playing music.

"Stop playing music," Minerva snapped.

Minerva leaned in closer to hear the conversation better.

"You know what I mean," the worker said.

The janitor nodded and vanished. Not vanished as he left but vanished as he walked through a wall and disappeared.

Reyna gasped. The female worker they spoke to earlier was speaking to other workers, maybe the manager, and pointed in their direction.

"Just casually stroll to the wall," Artemis muttered. "Casually."

Reyna looked at Minerva and Artemis. "Let's be annoying teens!" she whispered.

Minerva leaned in. "I just told you a very funny joke."

Minerva and Reyna bursts out laughing.

"They are, eh, getting a lot closer," Artemis noted. Naturally, everyone ignored him. Inside, Artemis cursed himself. He was becoming less and less like the brilliant person with an IQ larger than any person in Ireland's and more and more like Holly.

Reyna quickened her pace. She broke out running. The woman pulled out a gun and fired. It found its mark. Reyna fell to the ground unconscious.

Artemis groaned. No human can survive that. No one. Artemis grabbed Minerva's hand and guided her to the wall and they walked through.

Inside was a dark cave. Obviously it was dark but it was really dark. You couldn't see your own hand if you took it and our it right in front of your eyes.

A figure stepped from the shadows. Artemis's heart skipped a beat. Holly?

"No," it replied. Artemis was confused but quickly realized he voiced his thought out loud.

Another figure appeared. Clearly a female as you can see from the long blonde hair. Then again, that Legolas had long blonde hair and he was a man.

The figure slipped behind Minerva and slid through the wall.

Minerva stepped closer to the mysterious figure. "Who are you?" she asked. "We have twice the men as you and powers you could never dream of!" she proclaimed confidently even though her legs were shaking in fear.

Artemis was stunned. That seemed to be happening more and more lately. Gone was the girl that cowered when someone who could clearly kill them with a hand. Now a brave woman fought instead of leaving.

The figure was doing something with his hands. You could barely tell that he was even there, much less what he was doing. Artemis had a slight advantage with his sight being better than anyone he knew of so he could distinguish the fact the area was darker.

A small light appeared, but it was more than enough to see the face of the man. The man's left cheek was scarred and his body was slim but muscular. He had dark brown hair and hazel eyes.

"Come, we must show you to the others." The man seemed to be deciding what to do with them.

"First, your name," ordered Artemis.

"Rodrigo."

Rodrigo set off without waiting to see if they would follow. It was pretty clear: follow or die.

Minerva followed Rodrigo leaving Artemis alone in the dark. Artemis was still debating on going or not. There was something wrong with 'Rodrigo'. Even the name didn't fit him quite the way most names did. Artemis sat down on the hard, cold floor to meditate. About three minutes later, he heard a scream.

Zane and Foaly were still in the Operations Booth, waiting for Artemis and Reyna to return.

It had been several hours before anyone even thought to check the locator.

"Foaly, do you think the Worsfer malfunctioned?" Zane carefully asked.

Foaly looked mad. No, angry. Way more than angry, more like a word previously unknown to the People or humans. "Zane," he said slowly, "what on Earth gave you the idea that my equipment can do such a thing?"

Zane plucked up the courage to mention what he been wanting to say for a long time. Since Artemis's rebirth. "Foaly, you changed. A lot. You no longer use sarcasm, no pissing off the Kelps, no bragging about your inventions. You turned into a Root version of Foaly. To answer your question, you haven't seemed to check anything anymore."

Foaly sighed, knowing Zane was right. "Let's see exactly where they are." Foaly activated Holly's tracker and saw it moving swiftly away from an unreadable location? Soon, it was clear where they were going.

"Zane, where is Mort Mart?"

"Ten klicks away. We could make it there before Commander Kelp and Corpal Frond get back."

Foaly smiled. "I made this new invention called the Cleanshot 2000. It can transport anything into the set coordinates. In about a minute, we should have the location and be on our way."

One minute later, they were holding the Cleanshot.

"Foaly, any reason you named it Cleanshot?" Zane wondered.

Foaly grimaced. "Let's hope you don't need to know."

They appeared right outside Mort Mart in the midst of the destruction. A few humans looked in their direction.

"Foaly, they can see us!" hissed Zane as he shielded. Foaly grabbed his Camfoil (is that how you spell it? I was too lazy to Google search it). He covered himself with it and they traveled into the store.

Right when they got in, a human hit his watch and whispered so softly, only a machine made by the likes of Foaly or Opal could catch it. Code Black.

**Review! It was updated faster because of a review! So review and make me happy which will make this come faster!**


	10. A Lot of New Arrivals

**Thanks to my reviews. Did I warn you I might kill someone? Oh well. **

Her mind was foggy. She tried sitting up. Ouch! She thought. She tried opening her mouth. Nothing. Once again, she tried sitting up. A horrible pain shot through her arm. She fought it and put her elbows behind her am pushed upward. She was now in a sitting position-what was that? A shout of pain-maybe an animal made it-ht her ears. She tried ignoring it by humming-or trying to-Counting Stars. The screaming grew louder whenever she hummed louder.

That's it, she thought. She pushed her hands on the ground and stood, almost instantly collapsing. She stood again and slowly opened an eye. Immediately, she shut it. There appeared to be a humongous elephant with these giant tusks with these weird demented hybrids-nothing natural can be that ugly. Slowly, she opened them both. Her eyes were seeing it but her brain refused to believe it. Look again! Her brain was saying while her eyes were protesting, We are!

There was giant elephant like creatures, but something was different. Like they weren't from here. A different dimension, she saw that on television before.

Another scream. "You don't have any friends, nobody likes you." Though at the same time, it was saying something different.

"Cold be heart and hand and bone. Cold be travelers far from home."

There was a sound of rippling water.

A horrible voice was singing. "The rock and pool, is nice and cool, so juicy sweet. Our only wish,"

There was the sound of slapping something-a fish?-on an object, most likely a rock. "to catch a fish," Definitely a fish. "so juicy sweet."

There was the sound of teeth tearing apart something. She shuddered to think what it was. She then realized that she didn't want to be noticed and stayed as still as possible.

"A bigger one! We will gets our revenge, we will!"

She turned around and nearly fainted.

It was bone-white, had pale skin, but wore dark clothes, thin, had only six teeth sharpened into points, small slimy creature, emaciated, and gaunt. This creature walked up to her on all fours.

It studied her for a second and grabbed her wrists. It possessed a vicious, wiry strength and his malice gives him a strength hardly to be imagined. Its soft, but horribly strong.

It gripped her tighter, cutting off her circulation. She gasped. The pain. She opened her mouth. Juliet screamed.

[~_~]

Lili Frond was always regarded as a bimbo that couldn't find the way out if a paper bag and that was the way she liked it.

Lili let herself recover for a moment to fix herself. Hey, she wasn't a bimbo but that doesn't mean she wanted to be covered with blood. A few moments later, she was better. Still covered in blood, but better. She shielded and slipped inside Mort Mart while Artemis, Minerva, and that Mud Girl were trying to get in.

Quickly, she discovered the entrance to the secret cave.

A dark haired man and a man who dyed his hair green were talking.

"Alex, you can't possibly allow them to get in." The green haired man was looking at the other.

The dark haired man-Alex-was speaking. "Relax, Tobais, we will defeat them."

Lili darted behind them.

Two figures entered the cave. The cave's lights flickered out.

Lili caught a glance of the figures right before the lights went out. Artemis and Minerva.

"Holly?" Artemis asked.

Alex looked at them. "No."

Lili unshielded and stepped closer.

They continued talking for a few minutes and Alex-or Rodrigo as he called himself-made a silent request for them to follow. More accurately, a challenge. Fail and you die.

Minerva trotted after him like a love sick puppy, then again, maybe she found him hot. Who would ever know?

Artemis hesitated and sat down to meditate. Lili was debating whether to approach him.

When she had decided, a human girl screamed.

Artemis's eyes flew open. Their blue was so intense that Lili recoiled.

Lili regained her composure and walked over.

"Artemis," she whispered.

Artemis glared. "Frond."

Lili glared back. Seriously, being a 'bimbo' does not mean you have to call her by her last name or insult the elven king.

"Artemis, come on!" Lili continued glaring. "Alex is most likely going to kill her!"

"Alex?"

"Alex, or otherwise known as Rodrigo, the one who had Minerva follow him, is probably going to kill her!" she screamed.

"Where is the proof of such a thing happening? He is a man, Minnie is a woman. They are on the same side."

Oh my Frond. This Mud Boy was so stupid sometimes. Which made that pony stupider when the stupid Mud Boy could hack the pony's so-called unhackable sites.

"Artemis." Lili was trying really hard to remain calm. Or punch him in the face. "He already lied to you about his name. In his conversation with Tobais-" Artemis opened his mouth to comment.

"He was the man who Alex was talking to," Lili explained.

Artemis ignored Lili's explanation. "I wasn't going to ask that. Tobais was the one who got Reyna's house blown up!"

"Even more of a reason Minerva is in danger!" Lili slid to the wall.

Artemis tilted his head. "Are you actually looking for a light switch in a cave?"

Lili rolled her eyes. "You actually think that this place is always this dark?" Lili patted the wall. "Here!" A black button appeared.

"Frond, don't!" Artemis shouted, grabbing her arm as she pressed the button.

[~_~]

Zane was wandering. "Foaly."

"What? Do we need the Cleanshot?"

Zane sighed. "You haven't even told me what the Cleanshot is. No, Foaly, it's just that everyone in the room is looking at us."

Foaly looked around. It was true, everyone was looking at them despite Foaly being covered in Camfoil and Zane shielding.

"D'arvit! You didn't grab the right foil, I can see right through it!"

"Hey," whined Foaly.

Zane shook his finger at Foaly playfully. "You never learn, do you, Pony Boy? 'Hay' is for horses."

"Well then, why don't you stop your little game?"

Zane smiled. "Lets play Sticks!"

Foaly cocked his head. "What?"

"You know, where you use your hands and when you hit the opponent's hand with your hand, the amount of sticks you have go up? Pass 5 and you lose?" Zane feigned surprise.

"Challenge accepted," Foaly declared and the intense game of Sticks began.

Meanwhile, everyone conscious in Mort Mart, where circling them. Well, not circling, more like, trapping them.

"I won!" declared Zane before he won when both him and Foaly had one stick on one hand remaining ad it was Foaly's turn.

"We'll see about that," Foaly said as he hit Zane with his stick. Zane now had two sticks on one hand and zero on the other and he clapped and he had one on each hand.

"Go," Zane told Foaly.

A young girl with wavy blonde hair stepped forward with a sword in her hand, along with a woman with wavy black hair with a bit braided in the back, only the woman had daggers in her hand. A man stepped forward. He was dressed in white and had a really weird white staff in his hand. Another man stepped forward. He had long black hair and his eyebrows were in the way brows were when someone was angry. He also had a sword. Then there was a king, clearly on a horse.

The group were right next to Zane and Foaly, literally one step forward and they would be touching.

"Hahaha, see, I'm going to win!" Zane had three sticks on one hand and nothing on the other while Foaly had one hand with one stick.

Foaly felt a sword at his throat. "W-wh-"

The young girl glared at him. "Stay quiet if you value having a tongue."

Zane groaned and he felt a dagger on his throat.

"Pathetic excuse for an elf," spat the man with black hair.

"If only we had Reyna here," murmured Zane but the woman with black hair caught it.

"Who is this Reyna?" she asked as her eyes darted around the room and found the only girl unconscious.

"Look, papa!"

The man with the black hair rose his free hand. "Galadriel! Thrandriul! Get her!"

A woman with long wavy blonde hair stepped out of the crowd surrounding them and a man with straight long blonde hair stepped out and ran seemingly without breathing to Reyna, grabbed her by her armpits, and darted back to the man.

Another guy with straight long blonde hair stood. "Lord Elrond." He addressed the man. "What are we going to do with these?"

"That calls for a council. Hopefully it won't be like for Frodo," Elrond responded. "Gandalf, what do we do with the girl?"

The young girl with wavy blonde hair stepped forward. "Lord Elrond, Lady Galadriel, Lord Thranduil, leave her with me. She is not old enough to be corrupted with their ways."

Galadriel knelt down. "Éowyn, are you sure of this? She may have been counseled by Saruman."

Eowyn glared. "You all think there is no good in the world!" she shouted, grabbed Reyna, and left.

"The Council of Elrond is now in session," Elrond announced. "We are here to decide what to do with the elf and-" Elrond glanced at Foaly. "-centaur."

The man on a horse studied him. "A pathetic excuse. This horse will be no use for he is already merged with a man."

An elf with straight, long blonde hair stood. "Save the elf. He is one of us. I care not for what happens to the horse."

"And I suppose you think that everyone likes the elves, Erestor?" a small, beaded man said. "But I do think Theoden is right." The small man said, looking at the man on a horse.

A dwarf and an elf, Zane realized. But not the ones Haven has, more like Legolas.

"Anyone disagree with Legolas's suggestion?" Elrond questioned.

"I do, and I'm sure my kin would to," the dwarf said.

"Gimli, son of Gloin, your kin are dead, which you and the Fellowship discovered in the Mines of Moria," snapped Thranduil.

"Anyone else?" Elrond questioned. No one objected. "Motion passed!" he announced and he moved his arm.

The blade cut into Foaly's neck and blood splattered.

A black fog seeped out of the Council and they became unconscious.

[~_~]

Éowyn leaned down to Reyna's ear. "Wake up!" she whisper-shouted urgently.

Nothing happened. "Wake up!" she repeated, slapping Reyna across the face.

Reyna sat up. She out her hand to her nose. "Ugh, again?" she groaned. Then she noticed Éowyn. "Huh?"

"Reyna, the elf and centaur are most likely dead."

Reyna shook her head. "You can't be Éowyn. Even if I've seen Legolas defend us and be attacked by Gollum, you can't be Éowyn."

"Why?"

"Because you are so frickin' awesome," Reyna replied. "A girl of Rohan, the woman who went into war, the one who killed the dark one."

Éowyn held her head. "I don't remember much from that war except . . . Aragorn."

"Well, help me save my friends and then I'll help you with Aragorn," Reyna suggested.

Éowyn nodded. "There was something to do with a wall?"

Reyna's eyes widened.

Éowyn quickly said something. "I could be wrong, but that wall was the direction you were heading."

"Come on!" Reyna shouted as they ran through the destruction to the wall.

There was an group in front if the wall.

"We will summon more," a dwarf threatened.

"Summon what? A bunny?" scoffed Éowyn.

A man with this weird staff stepped forward.

"Saruman," whispered Éowyn and Reyna.

"Shama dezama!" he chanted and the army that marched to Helms Deep appeared in front of them.

The Uruk Hai stepped forward and Éowyn raised her sword while Reyna thrust the orb out in front of her.

It grew white and spun Saruman in circles. Then it turned blue and birds came swooping at Saruman. Reyna dropped the orb.

Éowyn was decapitating a Uruk Hai and everyone froze.

"Isn't that . . ." she trailed off. "Reyna, cast it into the fire!"

Reyna looked at her confused and Saruman raised his staff and Grima Wormtonugue came out.

"Destroy the girls," he ordered.

"Fire? Where?" Reyna's voice was slightly panicked.

"Sorry, grab-cast it into the fire!" Éowyn grabbed her throat. "Gr-ca-rb-st it-no, you don't have any-"

Reyna stood there in shock and Wormtongue went up to her with a raised knife.

Saruman's army charged. The Uruk Hais swarmed them and Éowyn was still being forced to say, "Cast it into the fire!".

Éowyn fought bravely, but eventually she was overwhelmed. An Uruk Hai slashed at Éowyn which hit her stomach. She needed to be protected, Reyna thought. Reyna was inexperienced with fighting, but she took Éowyn's sword and swung it at the nearest Uruk Hai. It was surprisingly heavy and Reyna hit the Uruk Hai's foot.

The workers were coming.

"Help!" Reyna pleaded. "We need medical attention!"

The workers ignored her. One turned to Saruman. "Summon the Ents. That should teach them not to interfere."

Saruman nodded. He began chanting again and Ents appeared.

Reyna held up her sword and an Ent picked her up. She screamed,

"Éowyn, get to the wall and warn the boy named Artemis about this!" Reyna commanded, forgetting about Éowyn's injury. Éowyn tried walking but failed. She crawled to where Theoden was. Éowyn entered the black fog and disappeared. Then the Ent holding Reyna marched through the wall.

**Did I kill him? And review people, seriously. Or I might kill another person. That is, if he's dead. So how did you all like more Lord of the Rings? Or should I stick to mostly Artemis Fowl? **


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